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The Love of Your Love

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The Love of Your Love

I know I made it a conscious effort not to go into a relationship with somebody I knew I already liked too much. I just felt it was going to get messy – I being the girl in there, and oh yes, I did get my share. You know that stage where the guy is now in the position to do the “shakara” – the-feeling-scarce-and-I-am-only-available-when-I-want-to-be yea? So I knew I had to give myself brain by being on top of my relationship matter; I knew I had to step up to what I wanted and how exactly I wanted to be treated in my own romance relationship. And God helped me.

Guys that say girls are clingy, more often than not, do not like ladies who are always readily too available. Some people say it is because the guy doesn’t love the lady as much as she loves him. While I may agree – to some extent – I will still say that may not be entirely true. Why?

In a relationship, you have to know how to place value on yourself; you have to know when to let this person feel your importance; you have to show (not command though) some tenacity – you have to be able to earn the other person’s commitment while they are still giving it in utmost quality.

So I decided to do a poll on all of my social media platforms and the responses were stunning, yes, very… I think I almost didn’t expect people to open up as they did with their responses and this really showed how much people around you only need you to reach out to them, be friends enough with them, be a shoulder enough to be leaned upon.

The Question I asked on the poll was quite simple, a bit confusing maybe but trust me it was all to get them to keep talking; to get people to explain what their stance really was about. And mehn, we got it!

HORPTIE: Guys that are always at your beck and call are not enticing/appealing.

YAYY OR NAH

From here, I’d do a Vox pop illustrated by paragraphs (so it doesn’t get whelming as I also felt when I initially got the pool of it). This article just might extend to another post.

Enjoy some hilarious as well as some very insightful comments yea… Please note that the respondents of the vox pop have been given pseudonyms for the purpose of anonymity.

RESPONSES FROM FEMALE –

“The general trend is that girls don’t like nice guys. Personally I disagree because it all boils down to the stage the girl is in life – is she ready to settle down or not? Or who should now be enticing to me if not nice guys?!” — Kendra
sigh

“Ladies think some relationships are just best at friendship level, not because we don’t like the guy but because as friends we are able to truly know and understand ourselves – guys won’t understand this. There are guys we snap our fingers and they will be here for us; those kinds are 90% not appealing plus the probability that they will be ugly or have one irritating attitude is certain”. (That one got me laughing hard plus I noticed about two more ladies had this deduction.) — Perry

“I don’t like clingy guys. I will only want the one I like to be as available as he can be – so it boils down to how much I like the guy”. (I had a number of persons agree that if both parties love each other just as much, then none will even notice if the other person is seemingly too available – this to say, both partners must make it a conscious effort to give just as much as the other person: true love and commitment). — Ladeola

“As a strong-willed, independent and confident female, who wants a puppet? So, yayy I don’t find them enticing or appealing”. — Waliya

“It’s in two ways; I like the chase (everyone does). Sometimes the guy too should do small ‘shakara’, behave a little busy – don’t just do that excessively else you will hear it. A man who listens at the snap of your fingers can be very unattractive and boring and so not exciting. On another note, men are always the alpha but when you become a man’s weakness it is very empowering – maybe I like control sha”. — Comfort

“A guy always at your beck and call is so cute; not the slow and stupid kinda. When he doesn’t correct you when you should be corrected, that is fine. But when he always tries to make it seem like you are always right? Well then, that is so unappealing – Relationships should also include growth”. — Success

“It can be really appealing because it shows that they really care and that they value the friendship. At the same time, it can be very irritable when it becomes excessive and obsessive”. — Constance

“I am an attention lover and so I definitely will find a guy who is always readily available very enticing to me”. — Desola
pretty

So who got something in there?

Like I earlier mentioned, this article will be continued in a next post to efficiently help you digest the content of each.

One last thing for now… What can one possibly do to satisfy man-kind? Yea, anybody with suggestions, please? Alongside, I implore you all reading to kindly drop a thing or two of what you possibly think as regards the matter we are discussing.

I love you guys!
Horptie.

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Hey there, welcome to my blog; a faith, relationship and lifestyle blog. Thank you for the opportunity to share my world and knowledge with you. Stay with me as we cruise and explore on life matters as it relates to me and you.

11 Comments

  • Taiwo Tosin A. Esq
    September 20, 2018 at 3:51 pm

    Ask a blind man to desire something, unarguably be sure he will desire to SEE, with no special interest to feel or smell, cos he had maximized those senses all his life.
    The desire to have someone hover around and all about you or not depends on what u may have been deprived while growing up…… Love, Attention & Affection are element that makes you Whole.
    Patronize someone who grew up never to hear someone around him/her say I Love you(even parents) ….. Then u will know how much it takes to capture the heart denied 😍

    Reply
    • horptie
      September 21, 2018 at 11:57 am

      Hmmmm… So very true. Still I think some other persons may not find it so comfortable getting that much attention as they are not used to it – it all still boils down to the individuals involved and how much they have learnt about receiving and giving love.
      Thank you so much for your input… Cheers to a great weekend dear.

      Reply
  • Phemmy
    September 20, 2018 at 5:28 pm

    Wow
    Beautiful!!!!
    I found this article both interesting and educating from beginning to end
    It just go’s down to the fact that there is a place of studying to the point of understanding, what your partner wants or requires as applicatable.
    I believe everyone’s environment while growing up goes a long way to determine what the guy or lady wants unconsciously.
    Some have always been Carving to have that one person to share with, this to them fosters the love they have for their partner, I’m of the opinion that every Lady likes attention, only that there are tendencies of getting bored by the daily conversation stuff.
    Aside from putting out calls to them, there are many other ways we can reach out to our partner(s) to reinforce the love we share.
    Sending a picture of yourself smiling, on a social media platform could be just enough for that day.
    Sending a love song to them could be just cool
    A simple text message *You have an awesome personality, i like you! I would always keep in touch* might prove enough
    Some reaching out to someone they love. Can just be his/her own definition of he care’s
    Some a moment of silence just to know the impact of your would have on them. This period gives time for amazing reflections and also can prove otherwise
    Deliberately do not want to mention surprise (gift/outings) it can not be overemphasized
    Help out in daily chores, like assignment in their absence
    No mater what you do, you just sometimes have to be unpredictable.
    There are many other ways to communicate love, the daily routine way of reaching out to them is what makes them feel irritated. Coupled with the fact that some partners can be boring, if you have that common ground, which can always be developed, I mean sufficient common thing of interest or attraction, being a football lovers, love politics, religious discussion, talks about nature, movies,music,books,fashion, even clubing and so on. Every partner would always die to hear from the other end.
    Even if the best way your can communicate to some is simply keeping to your words, succeeding at what you do, hearing other people applaud you and surprisedly knowing every other person around are dying to be yours

    Reply
    • horptie
      September 21, 2018 at 8:45 am

      Wow wow Wow! You did so much justice with your comment – very adequate. I was able to point some that relates to married couples as well as single ones.
      Thank you so much for your contribution and for taking time out here, don’t forget this article will be continued next week.
      I’m sure you are doing alright… do have a blissful weekend dear.

      Reply
  • The Eclectic Contrarian
    September 22, 2018 at 12:51 am

    “Guys that say girls are clingy, more often than not, do not like ladies who are always readily too available.”
    Exactly. Guys don’t like “clingy girls” because they only want them around when it suits them. A relationship on demand sort of thing… “I love you but don’t call me, I’ll call you..”

    Reply
    • horptie
      September 22, 2018 at 9:10 am

      Sadly. I believe “clingy” is relative and you only get to think that for almost the same reason you have clearly mentioned and that is absolutely no sorta relationship at all!
      Thank you so much for stopping by… have an amazing weekend dear

      Reply
      • The Eclectic Contrarian
        September 22, 2018 at 2:00 pm

        I enjoy your blog!

        Reply
        • horptie
          September 22, 2018 at 5:03 pm

          Thank you! And you are most welcome here

          Reply
          • The Eclectic Contrarian
            September 22, 2018 at 5:24 pm

            Thank you!

  • The Love Of Your Love 2 – horptie
    October 11, 2018 at 12:55 pm

    […] STILL FIND THEM ENTICING/APPEALING? I shared from the females’ perspective; you can view via > https://horptie.wordpress.com/2018/09/20/the-love-of-your-love/

    Reply
  • The Love Of Your Love 3 – horptie
    October 18, 2018 at 9:09 am

    […] Not? If you are just reading on this topic, you can find the links to the two previous post here { https://horptie.wordpress.com/2018/09/20/the-love-of-your-love/ and https://horptie.wordpress.com/2018/10/11/the-love-of-your-love-2/ }. Here. It is a two-way […]

    Reply

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